avatar_state | IC INBOX \ House Details (Deerington)

IC INBOX \ House Details (Deerington)

Hi! You've reached Korra! Umm, I think this is recording? Maybe? If you can hear me you're supposed to...

[The sound of rustling paper, a note being picked up and read from.]

Leave a brief message after the beep. Wait, do I do the beep or does i-

BEEP

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So...what is she now?

[A face full of sympathy, and potential dread - do they have yet another foe here, now?]

An immortal deer god. Twisted and blinded with loss and rage.

[Then a loud exhale]

That's why she frightens me. She's lost everything.

[A moment of silence. Korra will see in The Doctor's eyes that he knows that feeling.]

All that pent-up rage and pain.

[Ten pulls on his cheeks and chin. Then speaks in a worn voice]

A long time ago, one of my faces was part of a war. A never-ending war.

I lost everything. My family. My friends. My home.

I'm not even sure how long aftterwards I was roaming time and space. Not wanting to have anyone to travel with me. Not wanting to have more grief. That big-ear face pushed so many away. Told them no. That I was fine. Even the ones that found me soon after having regenerated and nursed me back to health.

[A short pause]

I could have been like Romana's spirit form. Quite easily.

[An exhale]

I've had moments here that have pushed me. Trying to get me back in that direction.

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

[She's quiet a long moment.]

But you're not, and you really need to remember that. But...is there anything we can do for her?

[There's a deep and heavy sigh. He really wants someone to hug him right now. But he won't ask. He's shook. And it takes a lot to shake him. But he has times when he's afraid he can regress backwards. That he's not healed from all the blood and fighting. Ten's voice is low and in a whisper. Korra can see the fear in his eyes.]

But I could be... I commanded The Ents here to kill the orcs. Months ago. Seeing my friend get slaughtered by them. I snapped.

I'm not human. And seeing her like that. With her humanity gone.

[Ten's eyes twitch. Korra might see that his brown eyes now seem to look like those below in space. The Doctor is remembering Cassandra. The first time as Nine. Nine didn't care. His voice is filled with caution]

I could be like her so much if I'm not careful.

I don't know. She wouldn't talk. Too much pain to talk. To reason with.

[He hates that she had to burn]

I want to help. I don't want to kill. No more. No more.

[She sighs, nodding.]

Then don't. Be yourself, not the...person this place wants to make us into. People of...our power. We have to strive all the harder.

Because killing is easy, all it takes is...thoughtlessness. Taking the easy path.

And we lean on each other.

[Ten sighs and ruffles his hair]

Myself is complicated. Because - I wasn't always a pacifist. That's not what Time Lords are. They're very logical with their calculations, usually. And that's how I was. For a long time. If I had to take a lives to save the universe... I have. If I had to die to save the universe, I also have.

[The Doctor can hear that Dalek saying; You would make a good Dalek]

And you're right. It is an easy path. It's a survival instinct. Doesn't take understanding or forgiveness.

You've walked in time more than any of us - you're...also facing larger stakes than I can even imagine. I'm not surprised.

But that's the key, it's...not when you can. About making a choice. About not using a weapon when it's in your hand.

[Ten is thinking about that one time in paricular. There's a worn face on Ten. Those brown eyes are clearly not human. Ten gives Korra a firm head nod]

Thanks for being understanding.

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IC INBOX \ House Details (Deerington)

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CW: implied genocide

Re: CW: implied genocide

Re: CW: implied genocide

Re: CW: implied genocide

Re: CW: implied genocide

Re: CW: implied genocide

Re: CW: implied genocide; talk about genocide in link